Sunday, October 13, 2019
Hey, You …
I recently saw the film JUDY, based on the life of Judy Garland. It is a beautiful, moving film and I highly recommend you taking a trip to the theater to catch it.
There are no spoiler alerts here, but I am going to touch on something from the film. I’m letting you know now, in case you want to wait before you continue reading this Meechie until after you’ve seen the movie.
Okay, then. Have it your way.
In rebellion, a young Judy Garland jumped in to a swimming pool on set … hair did, nails did, everything did. Fully clothed.
Her ‘handler,’ a middle-aged woman who wore knee-length gabardine skirts and double-breasted jackets at all times, was horrified. Judy had on a beautiful dress and was about to do a video shoot to publicize her birthday (except it wasn’t her birthday, but that’s another essay).
Lou Meyer, the head of MGM, chastised Judy for the stunt, reminding her the pool was a prop, and props “… were not meant to be enjoyed.”
The yogi and yoga instructor in me wanted to shout out, “Not true!”
Alas, I was a mindful moviegoer and did not exercise my voice.
The line hung out in my head, marinating in all my Meechie Mail juices, ready to serve metaphor, lesson, purpose, and anything else it pleases.
Let’s talk about props, baby.
I started thinking about all the things I lean on to prop me up. All of the things I lean on, maybe on general purpose, out of habit. This examination forced me to review the utility of every prop, and take a closer look at my use or mis-use, maybe even dis-use of my supports.
There are people in my life I lean on, heavily, for support.
There are things in my life I lean on, heavily, for support.
There are thoughts I lean on contributing to feelings I lean on to validate my actions, inactions, successes and failures.
How are they serving me? What, if anything, am I contributing to them?
There are also people, things and thoughts I do not ask for support. I am afraid, embarrassed, not sure what to ask for … holding on to a catalog of excuses, all the while not getting what I need.
It ain’t no easy thing to take an inventory of your life, of your props, and begin to understand some of them are no longer serving you. And, others you can lean on a little more; put more of your weight in their strength, their love, their instruction.
I know I am firmly propped on love and support from some uber-strong props in my circle.
I am also conscious that I’m propped on routine, on complacency, and on remaining small in some areas of my life.
And, I’m not always using my props to extend my stretch, to lengthen and grow. I’m sometimes jumping in, fully clothed, with no strategy to find my own strength, my own voice.
So, I’ll continue taking this inventory and leaning in a little more where I have the space and permission to do so.
You’ll also find me letting go of props no longer serving me or my dharma, my life’s purpose.
The balancing act in between is life, my glorious life, and you’ll find me propped in a book, in a yoga class, with my family, or with my cats.
Leaning all the way in.